About how the average woman has her first pregnancy, followed by the average childbirth, many books, articles, etc. have been written.
But any printed recommendations, if we mean just the same average data, are by definition general in nature, and therefore it’s not easy to apply advice, for example, to a world-famous doctor even in the regional center (to say nothing of the province!).
However, finding myself in an “interesting” position, I still decided that I would not ignore general recommendations and, having bought literature on the topic, I began to build my life according to the rules that were proposed by psychologists, gynecologists, and other medical specialists.
Tip 1: Rather Confirm Pregnancy
Actually, there are two ways to clarify everything. The first is to use a home pregnancy test, which today can be purchased at any pharmacy.
According to the instructions to it, it’s enough to lower the “magic” cardboard strip (sorry for the physiological details, but this is a quote) “in a container with urine for 10 seconds, then place the test on a dry surface and after 3-5 minutes evaluate the result”: if in one red line appeared in the designated control zone - that means you are not pregnant, if two - then, accordingly, it is your turn to improve the demographic situation in the country. However, such testing often yields a very strange result: one clear line appears and one completely faded. In such cases, women do this: again they go to the pharmacy and ask the corresponding question to the employee there (they say, what would it mean?).
Often, in response, perplexed customers are offered to buy a couple more of these test strips: for example, Russian-made (cheaper) and German (it does not happen more expensive). Argument - the more experiments, the more reliable the result. And few will reveal the “terrible secret”: the reliability of the analysis does not depend at all on the number of studies, - it turns out, as indicated in the instructions for one of the tests (made in Germany), “in order to get an accurate result in the early stages of the delay, testing should be done in the morning”!
The second way to find out if you have an imaginary or real pregnancy is to go straight for an ultrasound scan. This study is very informative, it will help to determine the gestational age with high accuracy. You can go to a regular antenatal clinic, or you can go to a commercial medical center. In my case, the first was the prospect of waiting in a barely moving line, at first directly to the gynecologist, and then (after a few days!) To the specialist in the ultrasound room. In a private clinic, for consultation with an ultrasound examination, it was necessary to pay, albeit not a small, but quite a "lifting" amount, and at the same time it was proposed to come on the same day at a time convenient for me. I, as a busy and thirsty person to quickly find an answer to a burning question, without a doubt, chose the latter.
Tip 2: Rather register with the antenatal clinic
This is recommended before the 12-week gestation period. Women registered must follow the doctor’s recommendations, including regarding the timing of the tests.
When the time came to get on this same account, I went to the registry of my local women's consultation. The mood was so-so, but it was unexpectedly raised by a plate on the registrar's window, which stated that, among others, veterans and invalids of the Great Patriotic War were being served out of turn in the consultation.
I understand that theoretically, sores along the female side can fall on an elderly woman, but she could not imagine that the old woman would come to the antenatal clinic, even when she called on all her imagination to help. And I remembered the sign in English "No smoking!" ("Do not smoke!") In one of the rural hospitals, where once she happened to visit a relative. And what? Indeed, purely hypothetically, it could have been difficult to put a visiting Englishman on the hospital bed there, and what shame would it be if the hospital staff had not demonstrated their willingness to accept patients from Western Europe ...
At the doctor’s office, with whom I had to “go through life” for several months, there was a line of five women. But something else was more embarrassing: firstly, the reception was supposed to start 10 minutes ago, and the cabinet door was still locked; secondly, women who are not very comfortable with longer gestation periods had to wait in the general queue!
... From the doctor I went out with a standard set of referrals for tests. "Will you take it for the first time?" - the sympathetic stranger from the line asked me a question and, having heard the affirmative answer, she specified: "Do you have shooting training?" Then she giggled. Having decided that pregnancy had a somewhat strange effect on the psyche of the young lady, I retreated.
But after a few minutes I realized that the curious person was all right with both the psyche and with a sense of humor: it turned out that the containers - again, sorry for the specific details - to pass the well-known analysis are bottles with ... a very narrow neck , which you can get really only after repeated training.
A separate topic is blood tests. The fact that they had to be passed quite often even with a favorable pregnancy did not cause delight. But sometimes it was necessary to retake blood from a vein also because the analysis ... did not work out - they say, then there are problems with reagents, or something else.
At the same time, pregnant women invariably waited their turn, along with coughing and blowing their nose (there was a high incidence of acute respiratory infections and flu) people. The interpretation of the analysis results strained: if, for example, the result of the first was alarming, they sent for a similar re-examination; and if the second turned out to be normal, the problem was removed. But who could guarantee that the latter was more accurate?
Tip 3: Be sure to see your dentist
I didn’t even consider the option of a free visit to the dentist (again, because of the prospect of a long wait in lines and because I had been served in a dental clinic for several years, where the prices for quite high-quality services were not outrageous). The dentist found in me only one problematic toothache, and with some caveat, she dropped it in a private conversation: “In places where prices are high, you would certainly have found a sea of“ defects ”.
For the sake of interest, I later nevertheless visited a "dear place", and for sure: the local doctor almost cried out (they say, you need to urgently take action, otherwise after birth you will "get all sprinkled"!). Well, what can I say? I refused her services, and I did the right thing: by the time this article was written, enough time had already passed after the birth of my baby, but everything was in perfect order with my teeth, nothing “fell off” ...
Tip 4: More Fresh Air
Pregnant women are expected to walk outdoors as often as possible. Agree, the very idea of breathing in fresh air in a big city seems absurd. The question is more correctly posed like this: where can I find minimally polluted corners? Theoretically, these are all kinds of parks, forest plantations on the outskirts. But getting to them turned out to be a problem: both in public transport and in my car, like the vast majority of pregnant women, I started to feel sick. As a result, I began to walk around ... my own balcony - because the windows of the apartment overlook a relatively green courtyard.
Tip 5: Go to the Genetics Doctor with your husband
The genetics doctor, to whom everyone is referred, needs to know thoroughly about the condition of both future parents, therefore it is better to come to such a specialist with your husband.
Everything, it would seem, is logical: the doctor really needs to ask both of them as much as possible about their health, about the health of their relatives, about the previously taken medicines, etc. Therefore, we, as responsible people, went together to the local diagnostic center.
The first shock had to be experienced when it turned out that for the study it was necessary to go up to the eleventh floor. That is, there is, of course, an elevator in the diagnostic center, but who was there, they know about his “elusiveness”: if you can wait for the cabin on the ground floor to go up, with some reserve of patience, then call the elevator to the upper floors, so that you can go down , not always succeeds and after a very long wait.
And then the second test. It turned out that future moms only need to come to genetics alone, without any dads! The doctor referred to a certain ban from above, the appearance of which was allegedly caused by the fact that not all men behave appropriately at such receptions - this seems to complicate the work of doctors. However: a) I happened to see more than once very frustrated, even crying, in this connection young pregnant women (they also dreamed that together with their loved one they would see their joint creation on ultrasound!); b) Of course, I am aware of the health of my spouse, but, of course, I can’t know all the nuances that are important from the point of view of genetics! Fortunately, there is a way out regarding point “a”: in commercial institutions, pregnant women are often reckoned with the desire of pregnant women to come for ultrasound examination not alone.
Tip 6: Exercise - with caution
Exercise during pregnancy is just as helpful as walking; however, it is better to deal with them under the supervision of experienced professionals.
The fact that in different publications there is conflicting information regarding the types of loads that are permissible during pregnancy, I will not go into detail. I note only as a reason for reflection: in one popular magazine, exercise on a stationary bike was welcomed as optimal, and for some time I even got carried away with it (such a simulator was available at home). But only until I read in another publication: an exercise bike and pregnancy are not friends! In general, having decided that an experienced instructor is really the person I need, I tried to find him in the clinic. However, standing in front of the pregnant woman did not take into account any group or individual physical education, respectively, and no one undertook to instruct me. Then I started phoning the sports centers and clubs I knew, naively asking: "Are you taking pregnant women?" They didn’t take it. True, in one of them they agreed to shelter me if I bring a medical certificate that, say, during the classes I will not have any fainting. I didn’t even try to find a doctor who would give me a document with a similar record ...
Tip 7: pregnancy training courses are welcome
Help in preparing for childbirth will help special courses for pregnant women, which are often organized at clinics.
In truth, I had high hopes for such courses, since going on maternity leave greatly limited me, the young lady is quite sociable, in communication. And, to everything, I was eager to find out about the specifics of the work of local maternity hospitals.
The first lesson was impressive even before it started: about twenty ladies with maternity-sized tummies gathered at the corresponding office in the polyclinic - this is eight “seats” nearby. The lesson began with a 20-minute delay, and since some conscientiously arrived in advance, they were forced to stand under the door, groaning and panting, for a total of almost half an hour. And all this in order to listen to a lecture on the three stages of childbirth and the features of each of them, as well as how to distinguish false contractions from the real ones. The listeners looked at each other in perplexity: after all, every sane pregnant woman had already learned such information! But the questions "is it necessary to take the so-called obstetric kit from disposable shirts, shoe covers and others like them to the maternity hospital?", "Do paid wards work in our maternity hospitals (plus how much it costs to stay there)?" and "is it possible for relatives to attend childbirth?" left without comprehensive answers.
The next lesson, which was held with the same limited number of chairs, talked about the undeniable benefits of breastfeeding. We nodded in agreement for 40 minutes, after which we parted, already feeling guilty in advance in case breastfeeding could not be established.
For the third time we were shown a video whose recording quality was as if it was shot twenty years ago, and on an amateur camera. It’s hard to say where the stories were recorded, because the voice-overs slurred about the need to attend the “lessons” of some specific breathing exercises that local specialists themselves hadn’t heard of and that it would be nice to go to the doctors ... with husbands (and how much nashenskie doctors welcome such joint visits, I mentioned above). In addition, it was described in detail what is permissible and what is not possible in the first and second trimesters of pregnancy - this is, I think, to refresh the memory of the spectators of the events of bygone days, since all who watched the film were already safely in the ... third - last - period.
Actually, the courses for pregnant women have been exhausted by these three classes. Yes, I almost forgot: they were not voluntary, but rather mandatory, as they were evaluated as part of the proper implementation by the pregnant women of the recommendations of the local gynecologist!
Tip 8: Get to Know Your Obstetrician Beforehand
It is advisable to decide in advance with the obstetrician-gynecologist who will be present during childbirth.
This, presumably, makes sense for two reasons. Firstly, at the most crucial moment, there will be a doctor nearby who will be as prepared as possible for possible emergency situations, as he is aware in advance about the features of your body (pain threshold, nervous system) and the course of pregnancy. Secondly, a woman in labor can give strength and patience is the only thought that there is a competent specialist nearby who can be recklessly trusted. In a word, such reinsurance seems to make sense, but! I know at least five women from among those who previously took care of "their" doctor, who later repented: "It would be better if I did not give birth to him ...".
Therefore, after analyzing situations known to me, I came to the conclusion: the coordinates of a doctor with an impeccable reputation will always be with me, but I will use them only if, God forbid, something awful arises. But, fortunately, nothing unplanned happened - except for the fact that my beloved child decided: his mother needed to go to the hospital ... late at night. Therefore, it didn’t make sense to bother anyone with phone calls, and when I was in the hospital, I confided in a team of completely unfamiliar doctors. And believe - did not regret it! And once again I was convinced: a good doctor is wonderful, but whether everything goes well (if you have in mind childbirth not complicated by objective factors) - also depends to a great extent on the woman herself, her moral and physical fitness, mood for the best, endurance and responsibility for the health of your baby.
... In general, the rules are rules, and reality is reality, and in order to protect yourself from disappointment, you need to adapt to it. To future mothers, this applies first of all.That’s why the very first inconsistencies of my expectations and what actually happened to me, forced me to come up with my own rules, life by which to a significant extent helped to preserve my (and therefore my baby's) nerves. So…Additional helpful tips for pregnant women:
- Do not really count on the condescension and participation of others, after all, pregnancy is a concern, first of all, personally for you and your family. Do not think that I am against an enthusiastic attitude towards pregnant women - life just shows: you will have less hope for someone - there will be less disappointments;
- If you do not have a relationship with your local gynecologist, do not rush to change it - the other one may be even “worse” (and it is possible that this is your subjective assessment). It is better to consult with another specialist at the same time, communication with which is a pleasure for you;
- Even if you found out something, at first glance, terrible about the course of your pregnancy (entwining the fetus with the umbilical cord, premature aging of the placenta ...), don’t panic: there will probably be dozens of prosperous stories — just hurry up to make relevant requests on the Internet;
- The simplest, while safe and effective exercise for pregnant women is walking. However, daily aimless walks are boring, but buying all kinds of little things for the unborn child is a great pleasure: today is a dummy, tomorrow a bonnet and the like. Those who, for reasons of superstition, do not want to buy a "dowry" in advance, can simply go shopping, writing in a notebook, what, where and at what price it will be possible to buy later;
- And the last. Everything that happens, unless it is a direct impact on your health and safety, must be treated with humor. Laughter, of course, is not always appropriate, but it certainly is never harmful.
